stupid fragile girlthing makes a mess of everything

Gosh this was a really fun read. As someone who has been having my first experiences with uploading my work online in more than one form, I really really feel for Elke. There's a lot of little things about them that really just hit home in such a specific way I don't fully know how to put it. 

Having a job so shitty and boring I've seen a lot of people who say "just work on things in your downtime at work"  but that's basically impossible for anyone anxious about their writing or WHAT they're writing in public. The feeling of traveling internationally and knowing you're stuck in whatever situation you get yourself into is also such a specific and well written bit in here, even if you're somebody who's comfortable in your relationship. Very good!

I really enjoy how you painted the feelings of separation between Elke and Maude too, not just with their jealousy over how close they are or how much "better" she is, but the isolation of being out of the loop. Elke being too tired and overwhelmed by others  to be in all the online spaces (especially with people you just tolerate) leading to that self feeding cycle of feeling further and further away from them sucks! It takes a lot of time and energy to keep up with an online presence and their situation of having a long distance girlfriend, but not being chronically online (or at least actively involved) really really says a lot I think. 

I did crack up at the music choice for the scene on the river at first, but I think it worked by the time I finished it. Very solid work! Thank you for all your hard work!

(reposting my review from toxic yuri server)

wow this story hit really close for me. you mention it being a very personal work and i can see that, and i related to elke way too much, because of the creative insecurities, and a lot of other things.

this story taps into some very deeply ingrained anxieties - the lunch scene was particularly painful for me, the crushing feeling of being out of place and unneeded, and also elke finding out how abi made her, as her mommy, a funny bit to post online about... also the way elke would constantly avoid being honest to abi, and always had it in their mind that abigail could leave them at any moment when they find someone easier and more fun to be with. elke and abi's relationship had such a frustrating lack of communication and that felt very realistic and painful to read about.

the ending was unexpected - while i can see where it came from, it didn't really feel like a resolution, for example how abigail probably cheating on elke never came up again? abigail turns out to actually be kind of a shitty person, not just inconsiderate, and the way she presents her relationship to her online friends without elke's knowledge really was pretty gross. and elke giving up their personhood to be a doll doesn't really do anything to fix the relationship problems here, even if it gives them relief? kinda anticlimactic ending but i can respect the choice

also i gotta mention it as a side note: it was kinda surreal for me personally reading a vn with a protag who had so many insecurities similar to my own vn's main character and even used some of the same music tracks. medicine is just a really good album...